


Hit Me, Baby, One More Time

by buck_y_barnes



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-11
Updated: 2017-08-11
Packaged: 2018-12-14 05:22:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11776353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buck_y_barnes/pseuds/buck_y_barnes
Summary: A mysterious stranger prompts Dean to call his brother, Sammy. But little does Dean know, this stranger will change his life forever.





	Hit Me, Baby, One More Time

Dean flung himself onto his bed, sobbing loudly.

“My life is OVER!” he wailed into his pillow. He felt truly miserable.This was literally the worst day of his life. He couldn’t believe the nerve of that guy! Eating the last piece of pie! Ugh. That was Dean’s pie.

He flopped onto his back, still pouting, and called his best friend, Sammy. 

“Ugh! Can you believe the nerve of that guy? He ate the last piece of pie! I can’t believe it! That’s my pie! I’ll kill him!”

“Who, Castiel? I dunno, Dean, he’s kinda cute. In an awkward “newborn puppy with only three legs” way, y’know? But also in a “I wanna eat his not-so-Slim Jim,” if you know what I mean.” 

Dean sobbed again. “Sammy! You’re supposed to be on my side!”

“Sorry, but it’s true! Like, oh em gee, yesterday morning I was staring at… him… and gee whillikers, Dean, he’s bigger than that Annihilator horse dildo we found the other day!”

Dean began to rethink his vow to kill Castiel. He sniffled. “Ooh, tell me more, tell me more!”

“I heard some girls talking about his horse sized DNA rifle, and they all said it was the best vertical tango they’d ever danced.”

“Don’t you mean horizontal tango?” 

“No, I asked them about it and they all said it was vertical, ‘cause when he tops, and he always tops, all the blood drains to his meat thermometer and makes him pass out. So he can only have vertical sex.”

“Oh. Dang. Pardon my French.” 

“I know, right? I want him to impale me with his love muscle…” 

“That sounds heavenly,” Dean moaned sensually.

“Looks like you changed your mind about hating him,” Sammy laughed.

“Sammy,” Dean sighed, shaking his head. “Sammy. Sammy, Sammy, Sammy… Oh Sammy, oh Sammy.” He sighed again. “Sammy, you know nothing. Sammy, some days you have to choose. Sammy, some days there’s pie, and some days, Sammy, there’s meat pie.”

“I guess you can’t have your pie and eat it, too,” Sammy chuckled.

“You can if the pie is your boyfriend,” Dean said with a wink.


End file.
